Position vacant

I shouldn’t be here. I should be there, in that little dark hole, with a gallon of coffee and no windows, bashing away at my novel. I should be helping Charlotte to escape the clutches of the evil wizard, kiss the boy next door (again) and re-bandage the scar from her branding (yes you read that right).

But My NaNoWriMo dream is over for this year. My laptop, yes the one that had a crisis of confidence last week and checked-out, finally passed on yesterday. All efforts to revive it were futile. The hard drive’s fried. And along with it the first seventeen thousand words of the little tome I’ve been writing. It was hard enough to write them the first time around. I don’t think I can bear to try and do it again.

And the worst of it all? I was on track to win this year. Not that it’s a competition, but reaching 50,000 words in thirty days is a win in anyone’s book. (Pun unintended, although I rather like it.)

So the hunt’s been on for a new laptop. I’ve been interviewing all this week. Here’s the job spec:

• Must get up at the crack of dawn and not look or act in any way like it’s the crack of dawn (that position’s already filled).
• Must have large enough screen so that I don’t grow any more lines around my eyes from squinting and must have a full-size keyboard for my stubby fingers.
• MUST BE BLOODY FAST and able to multi-task to at least six simultaneous Google Chrome tabs without freezing up or sulking.
• Must have large enough hard drive to cope with the odd photo or thousand.
• Must not require second mortgage to buy.
• Must not comment or otherwise make derogatory noises about blog posts as I write them. Keep your views to yourself (and don’t tweet them either, I’m watching.)
• Must be duck-like (look pretty but paddle like the clappers).
• Must resist all attempts to trap biscuit crumbs/coffee stains/Rice Krispies/chocolate in it’s keyboard. (Get your own snacks.)
• Ability to make coffee and amuse a toddler a bonus.

I HEART YOU

 

It should be delivered at some point next week. In the meantime I’m bashing away on OH’s little notepad which I am, of course, eternally grateful for but which is…errr… rather slow.

And my NaNoWRiMo novel? Well, I’m not going to be breaking my back to get to 50k words by the end of the month now, but I can’t leave Charlotte battling away on her own, now can I? *Wanders off in search of inspiration to keep writing…*

What would the job spec for your latop/computer be?

 

Image: Michal Marcol / FreeDigitalPhotos.net